Tuesday, May 18, 2010


Satan as imagined by the creator of The California Raisins.

This is the from the movie The Adventures of Mark Twain (1986). It is a claymation version that surrounds the characters from his writings and general life musings from the author. In a particular stirring clip (after the jump)we see the children meeting Satan who goes on to explain his meaning of...well...life. I guess. Pretty scary stuff seeing as the age of the viewer was probably 5 - 8 years old.

Yeah, well. I'm fucked up. This video is a bag of coke thrown to Lindsey Lohan in after party. I know this video is old but someone threw a bag of coke to me at a Lohan afterparty. It was large and in charge. So, I'm still dealing with it. I found the full movie here, but I keep forgetting to link to it. Sorry for being so disconnected, but I am SOOO disconnectected. I'm sure that is a proper use of a comma but a horrible use of spelling. so eat a dik wit aids.

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Sunday, May 9, 2010

Bollywood's Chiranjeevi Would Kick Chuck Norris's Ass

Warning: Many horses and extras were violently injured in the making of this awesome chase scene.

Ask an American what the best chase scene in cinematic history and they say bullshit like Bullit! Or The Man With Golden Gun! If they are a badass they'll say, Smokey and the Bandit. Ask any Indian (dots, not arrows...) or anyone thats a true movie expert and they will tell you it's Alluda Majaka starring India's version of Bruce Lee, Chuck Norris, Stallone and Schwarzenegger and Jean Claude Van Damme all rolled into one. Chiranjeevi! I mean, just look at this dude!

This a doctor smoking a cigarette with a gun who can kick Chuck Norris's ass.

Click thru for the most badass chase scene you will ever see. As well as a TRACTOR FIGHT. That is all.

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Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Tyra Banks is Batshit Crazy

I have always hated this woman but now I have a reason. More »

Saturday, May 1, 2010


I used to know this girl. I'd go to her place to have a beer, the toilet and whatnot. She'd meet me down at the front after the respective phone call with a match. A match so exhausted I could smell her skin singe.

She never, ever, flinched though.

It was routine. I'd puff my cigarette twice and sit alone on the worn out couch. Worn down by pain, love and cigarette sin. I'd puff it twice more and take one long draw off the half filled glass of stale beer and we'd silence and watch the Earth move. No words, no emotion, just listen and watch.

We watched mostly through this picture frame that hung shantily on the living room wall. The futon that faced us relaxed eagerly suggesting the obvious but she and I weren't interested. The smoke filled the room and the picture changed moods letting the voices on the other side dictate the degree of aggression that was illustrated by it.

Cigarettes and empty ashtrays later we would awake from that moment we waited for. That shattering separation from reality that only that picture frame could give us. More »