Tuesday, May 26, 2009

A Letter From Our Future

I live in Bed Stuy, Brooklyn. The point of origination from such greats as Chris Rock and Biggy Smalls. I was lucky enough to find a letter on the ground the other day from November 28, 2007. It is a casual letter between friends (from TITI to KEITHY) . It covers all things that are common in a teenagers life. You know, getting banged out by a gut who alreday has a girlfriend, small acts of vandalism, family members dying, thoughts of suicide and an all out street fight. The girl is at least 16 years old because she is entering Job Corps. Anyway, it's sad and shameful, as well as checks off every stereotypic classification know to both teenagers and her probable ethnicity.

I have read many articles regarding texting affecting teens writing skills but I thought this was just stupid, out of touch, lazy journalists at the New York Times catching on to the latest (albeit very old...) fad. I thought that surely, there was no way a kid could not distinguish between typing on a LITTLE phone and typing on a BIG computer. For a grade? And switch from the abbreviated form to the more elaborate PROPER form that English teachers with big noses and dark framed glasses require?

(Just a disclaimer here, it's whiskey that affects my writing skills, not texting. In order to text, you have to have friends and I rid myself of those a long time ago...)

Back to what I was talking about...what was I talking about? Oh yeah, America's future. You thought the past few years was bad, get ready for Mad Max Beyond the Thunderdome style, converting pig feces into fuel, uber depression, Idiocracy level future ahead of us. And a quote from that movie:

"The #1 movie in America was called "Ass." And that's what it was. For 90 minutes. It won four Oscars that year, including best screenplay."

But back to the point I was making. This is a glimpse into a life that you have sense been removed from. (Youth, hope, and a the imagination of a promising future...) The full letter in its original neon green! format after the jump. Click on each jpeg to see it in it's full size.

And just for making it this far, here are DVD versions of both Mike Judge's (Office Space, King of the Hill, Beavis and Butthead) Idiocracy and Mad Max Beyond the Thunderdome. I watched ole Mel in this movie the other day and it still holds up.

Enjoy, and if your kid's got a cellphone, (especially an iPhone!) steal that shit back! It's for his own good!

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